Let's start this post off by telling you about my laptop. It is almost 5 years old but it's comfortable and it still works. It has all of my college pictures on it, the music I downloaded when I was at school (you know, before Pandora.. aka. I don't listen to any of it anymore...), papers I wrote through my undergrad career, oh ya, and the trojan files Matt downloaded on it when he was using my laptop to look at porn, but that's another story that's in the past, and even though I was given an external hard drive, which now backs up all of that stuff, I can't bring myself to reset my laptop. It runs slow sometimes, takes a while to load, the battery needs to be charging at all times or it dies in 6 minutes and start up literally takes 8 minutes. However, Dave and I splurged on a REALLY great desktop when we moved and I'll use that every once in a while if I don't want to deal with my laptop.
Well, today I get home and there is a package at the front door. I open it up and the inner box is for a brand new smaller, portable, completely clean laptop that Dave had bought for me for Mother's Day. I know, cue the awwwww's but here's the thing...
I felt so guilty about him spending that much money, right now, right before the baby that I asked if we could return it. I know, worst. wife. ever.
I wrote before how I felt guilty even spending money on a pedicure (which I don't need), never mind a new laptop, when the one I have now still works just fine. It's not the most amazing but it was brand new top of the line when I bought it. It has a 500g hard drive and still operates extremely well. I'm comfortable with it. Why spend the money if its not a necessity right now?
I think, wait no, scratch that, I know I hurt his feelings. He was so proud because like he said "He got me something I would never buy for myself" and when I buy gifts for m mom, who is one of the most special people in my life... that's how I think too. I want to give something that they would never do for themselves. I stressed that I really just wanted some flowers to plant and would be much happier with a backrub and a quiet night for just the two of us. I don't know. I am happy because we return the laptop, bought a couple of flower planters, potting soil, and a few trays of geraniums, impatiens, and pansies and I was completely happy. I know I sound like an ungrateful asshole but his money is our money and I can't be selfish enough to let him spend that kind of money right now.
So after a night of tacos, watermelon, and being curled up on the couch watching Tron Legacy, I have to know:
Am I the worst wife ever?