Nothing major has happened, nothing of much worth but I guess in the beginning I said I was going to write even if nothing fun was going on. It will be hard to compete with my last post I guess.
So what's going on in my life?
Spring break is over and it sucked to go back to classes. They're not hard and maybe that's what makes it so hard. I have no motivation and because all of my teachers are half-special, they have no assignments due until the last day of class and attendance doesn't matter at all. How am I supposed to feel motivated,or even obligated, to attend if there's no consequence for not going? Its only a couple more weeks and I know that I will be fine. I have all the work done but when I have so much going on, it feels like a waste of my time to sit and get lectured by a teacher who doesnt even care if I'm there or not. I have better things to do than sit and pretend to care if no one else does. Whatever, if I pretend to care for 6 more weeks I'm done.
I'm still getting a bunch of calls for Westport but mostly for Morton Middle School in Fall River. I hated my first day at Henry Lord and vowed I would not go back but I think I;m being stupid for that decision. Being a sub is harder than being a real teacher. I know 42 people are going to jump up my ass for that statement but hear me out. The teacher knows her students and (usually) has the respect from them at the beginning of the class. A sub is thrown into a new environment everyday and the stduents don't know her. We all know students test subs to see what they can get away with and I think maybe that was my day at Henry Lord. Granted Fall River is not the most desirable school district to be in but maybe my day would be different if the stduents knew me, I knew them, and I was more of a presence. Henry Lord currently has an opening for a fulltime ELA teacher next year and I think I'd be short changing myself if I don't apply. In the grand scheme of things, what's one year? If I hate it, I got my foot in the door and I can move on and maybe I'll love it when its MY classroom and I'm not just filling in for someone else. That being said, I am also applying to Plymouth as an ELA teacher because I love Plymouth and if I can get a job that way then david and I will really ahve a reason to move from where we are. It's comfortable but it's not going to be our forever place and if I can get a teaching job, that's going to be the motive to move. I reeeeeaallly want to be in a school come Fall but I've been let down so many times by the schools that I doubt I will find one.
Sometimes I question if I'm supposed to be a teacher. I know Im supposed to work with kids but you can only take so many rejections before you start to question if maybe you took the wrong path. i tell myself if its not meant to be then it wont be but it's hard to accept that sometimes. Part of me hopes that I'll have a teaching job in the fall, not just for the money and stability it would give but because it would give me a set schedule for the baby. david and I are alreday going to be working opposite schedules but this way, I know I'd have the weekend off to be with him and the little one. I want it bad; I'm just hoping it works out. Cross your fingers.
Yesterday was a great day. After working 10 days straight at the restuarant (because of spring break), I needed a day off. David had training in Framingham and I obviously jumped at the opportunity to head up that way. He has training from 10-4 so we went up the highway around 8 am, missed all the traffic, had Dunkins and explored B&N for a while. He bought Where's Waldo books! I loooove it! He was so excited, I've never seen him like that, especially about a book!He went to the theater and I spent the morning wandering around Shopper's World waiting to hear from Krystal about what her and the kids were up to. I went to their apartment and got to play with the 3 little ones. I seriously love them and it makes me excited for my own.david had lunch at 12 and he came back to their apartment for pizza and gingerale. Hannah was adorable and made the cutest comment ever. She goes " I remember David; he's so handsome!" When he walked in the door, she giggled and hid under the kitchen table yelling 'Handsome, handsome, handsome!!" So, so cute! I spent the afternoon at the Collection doing some shopping and it was actually hard.
Everyone who knows me, knows I LOVE to shop. I'm a bargain hunter and I think I get off a bit on completely winning in sales. For example: David and I went to Old Navy yesterday. David has put on weight since we got married and he went up a pants size. Knowing that summer is coming and he will need shorts we went to ON because the plain shorts (that he LOVES) were on sale from 29.50 to 15 a piece. PLUS I had a 30% off my whole order so 5 pairs of shorts and a pair of board shorts later: 58 dollars. Thats what 2 pairs would have cost! Go me! I need to get an amazing deal to not feel guilty abouts pending the money right now. I'm so overwhelmed and nervous about maternity leave that it almost makes me question everything I buy. That being said, I am following suit of a friend and doing some imaginary shopping. I found myself wanting to buy all of these things at the Collection but I guess putting your child's anticpated needs before your own wants is what makes you a good parent... A child outweighs this whole list but IF I could buy it all, no questions asked, this is what my list would look like:
1. Godiva chocolates, idealy the milk chocolate pops they made for easter. Only $6 but still too much for me to just purcahse for myself on a normal day.
2. Sperry boat shoes for the summer, these ones specifically. I've tried on about 600 and most come up too far on my foot and makes it look wierd, these are the perfect fit.
3. A massage. I REALLY need one. I don't know why I just don't go get one already but everytime I think about putting $70 down for a maternity massage I think about how many groceries that would buy...
4. The ENTIRE Victoria's Secret Pink line, especially the MLB Red Sox line. I used a gift card from christmas to buy one of tshirts and I am so excited about it but I would LOVE to have the sweatshirt. Ya, check it out here!
Plus, you know, all the baby stuff I want, a vacation with my little family somewhere wonderful, and whetever else my little heart desires....
Oh well, for now I'll be content with my family, my apartment and all the good things coming my way. <3